Change for the better - beyond the abuse
Even though much of the focus of this information has been about how to deal with dangerous and negative situations, we can always take encouragement from the many women, men and families that move beyond abuse and enjoy lives in peace on their own terms.
Before Shine's help
“I don’t feel safe.” She is scared of being choked again – “I feel anxious all the time. I don’t sleep so feel constantly tired. The fear is crippling.”
After Shine's help
“I’m the safest I’ve ever felt, ever since the locks have been changed. I’m now sleeping through the night. I walk freely without fear and I’m not looking over my shoulder.” The children can see a huge change in their mother who is now smiling, playing music, etc. whereas before she was irritable and unapproachable. “Everything is happening so fast – like a fairy story. He knows there is a whole lot of support for me and he can’t do it anymore.”
Before Shine's help
“I have been hiding in a wardrobe after work for half an hour until my mum gets home. At night I freak out at any noise. He has fully messed with my head and emotions – I don’t think I could ever trust another man.”
After Shine's help
“I feel very safe. I’m not sleeping with mum anymore – am downstairs in my own room and sleep all night. Having the alarm and all the other work done has made a big difference for me… I go out with friends now and am not scared of running into him. My self-confidence and self-esteem are improving all the time."
> Read some Men’s Stories from men who have changed their behaviour with support from Shine’s No Excuses Stopping Violence Programme.